The Parenting Trick Hiding in a Tennis Match:
How to Raise Winners with Patience by
Brian Kashman
Brian Kashman suggests that Parenting and tennis may seem like two very different worlds, but they share one powerful truth both are about teaching resilience, focus, and balance The parenting trick hiding in a tennis match is simple yet profoundly effective: it’s not about winning
every point but learning how to respond after losing one This mindset can turn everyday parenting moments into lessons that shape stronger, more confident children.
In tennis, every player faces moments of frustration. A missed shot or a double fault can feel like a small failure. Yet, the best players don’t let those mistakes define them. They reset, breathe, and prepare for the next serve Parents can learn from this When children make mistakes perhaps they spill a drink, forget their homework, or act out — the reaction matters more than the mistake itself Staying calm, like a tennis pro between points, teaches kids emotional balance It helps them see that one mistake doesn’t ruin the whole “match ”
Consistency is another hidden parenting skill that can be applied on the court A tennis player improves not by occasional great games but through steady practice In the same way, children grow best when their parents show up every day with patience and reliability. You don’t have to be a perfect parent just a present one Whether you’re cheering your child’s effort or helping them through a tough day, your steady support is what builds trust and confidence.
Tennis also teaches the importance of self-control Players who lose focus after a foul call often lose the match. Similarly, parents who react with anger or frustration can lose connection with their child The trick is to pause before responding Instead of shouting, ask calmly, “What can we do better next time?” This approach models problem-solving and teaches responsibility without fear.
Encouragement is the most potent serve in Parenting In tennis, even top players rely on cheers from their coaches and fans to keep their energy high. Children need that same emotional boost When you notice effort not just results you help your child build confidence that lasts. Say things like, “I love how hard you tried,” or “You kept going even when it was tough.” These small words can make a big difference The parenting trick hidden in a tennis match reveals that raising a child is less about control and more about providing calm, guiding support Just as in tennis, the real win isn’t about perfection it’s about persistence, patience, and the belief that every point, and every moment, counts