Bar•Bat Mitzvah – Fall/Winter 2025

Mitzvah Bar•Bat

Bar•Bat

MORE THAN A CELEBRATION

As we set out to create this year’s Bar•Bat Mitzvah issue, I found myself looking back—not just at the incredible stories we’re featuring, but at my own bat mitzvah years.

One of the highlights of this issue is a lookback with New York Times bestselling author and cartoonist Terri Libenson and ESPN Cleveland on-air host and producer Aaron Goldhammer, who both share with us their own re ections from their special day. Their stories pulled me straight back to the 1990s, when Terry Macklin was the DJ for b’nai mitzvahs in the Cleveland area. (He was the rst call you made after you secured your date.) My husband still laments that he couldn’t book Macklin for his bar mitzvah in 1992. I, however, got lucky years later—he came out of retirement for our wedding in 2011, after I wrote a feature on him.

As the experts in this issue note, DJs—far more than bands—are still the hottest trend for mitzvah celebrations today. The energy, the customization, the way they can make a room come alive—some things really don’t go out of style.

But the spiritual ritual and meaning aren’t only about the party. They’re also about purpose. That’s why we’re proud to showcase mitzvah projects in these pages, highlighting the creativity, compassion and impact of our community’s young people. Their projects, from urban gardening to collecting clothing for children in need, remind us that this

Terry Macklin – aka the Bar Mitzvah King – may not have DJed Becky’s husband, Geo ’s bar mitzvah in 1991. But he made up for it by DJing their wedding in 2011.

milestone is as much about giving as it is about celebrating.

I hope this issue brings back memories for some of you, inspires those in the planning

LOOKING BACK

Northeast Ohioans remember their bar or bat mitzvah

AARON GOLDHAMMER

On Air Host and Producer at ESPN Cleveland

Date of your Bar Mitzvah: June 22, 1996

Location:

Service at the JCC in Denver. Our congregation was building a new synagogue and held services there. The party was at Sfuzzi restaurant in the Cherry Creek Mall. Beautiful Colorado summer night.

Did you totally nail your Torah portion… or was it a struggle?

I was anxious about singing biblical Hebrew in front of so many family and friends. By the big day, I had completely memorized the torah portion, the haftorah,

and everything else. I remember the nerves melting away, and by the bulk of the service, I was having fun up there.

What was the best (or weirdest) gift you got?

My grandparents gave me a pair of nice binoculars. Thirty years later, I watched Sunday’s Browns games in the press box… through those same binoculars.

Is there a song that instantly takes you back to your Bar Mitzvah every time you hear it?

500 Miles by the Proclaimers. We did a special choreographed dance that would rival any Macarena or Electric Slide.

If you could redo your Bar Mitzvah as an adult, what would the theme be now?

The whole thing would be a sports talk show. We’d hit some torah topics, take a few calls from fans on the week’s parsha, get Kevin Stefanski’s take on the Talmud, and hit a few sponsor reads. My smile presented by Beachwood Dental and my bejeweled yad from Bookman and Son Fine Jewelry.

Did your Bar Mitzvah teach you something you still carry with you today?

I just remember having so much fun up there in front of the mic…and I think it was the rst of many shows I would go on to host.

Did you have a DJ or a live band—and how was the music situation?

We had a DJ who brought a ton of energy. But the hora was performed live by Cantor Marty Goldstein. Sfuzzi would never be the same.

What advice would you give 13-year-old you on that big day:

There are only a few times in your life that most of the people who love you are all in the same room. It goes fast. Slow down and take a minute to enjoy the view.

LOOKING BACK

TERRI LIBENSON

New York Times bestselling author and cartoonist

Date of Bat Mitzvah: May 1983

Location: Wilkes-Barre, PA

Was it your choice to have a Bat Mitzvah?

I don’t recall really having a choice, but all my friends were doing it, so… I was actually the rst in my immediate family to become a bat mitzvah in our Conservative congregation (even my older sister wasn’t allowed just years prior). I do remember feeling proud and accomplished for that reason.

Most memorable party moment—planned or unexpected?

I teamed up with some girls in my Hebrew School class to have a celebration at a local teen dance club (yes, this place existed). I was so shy and quiet at that age, so it was a big deal for me to feel included. That was a huge, memorable takeaway. This was over forty years ago, and it’s kind of a blur, but I know I had a great time and danced my tuchas o .

Dancing and fashion during your bat mitzvah years?

For fashion, I remember lots of bright colors and that othe-shoulder Flashdance look. Tragically, I can’t remember what I wore to my party, but whatever it was, I’m sure it involved legwarmers (I had a great rainbow pair). As for dancing, it was the Michael Jackson era, so moonwalking and breakdancing were the rage (note: I couldn’t do either).

Torah portion—nailed it or a struggle?

I did pretty well, with just a little bit of help from the rabbi.

Small anecdote: one of the books in my kids’ series, Becoming Brianna, features a bat mitzvah girl who gives a D’var Torah. So—although the rst one’s a blur—I’ve o cially written two of these speeches in my life. I can’t speak for the rst, but I think I nailed the second.

Best (or weirdest) gift?

It gures, but this one I remember. I mostly got money, but my parents gave me a beautiful gold bracelet and ring, which I still have. I wear the

bracelet on special occasions, but unfortunately two gems fell out of the ring. Don’t tell my mother.

Song that instantly takes you back?

Shout by the Isley Brothers. Kind of a dance trend that lingered for decades.

If you could redo your bat mitzvah as an adult, what would the theme be?

Ha! Probably something nerdy and cartoony.

What lasting lesson did your bat mitzvah give you?

I wasn’t a very good Hebrew student, and the cantor at my temple was not especially encouraging. I was proud and relieved to make it through without a hitch. But as an adult, I felt a little short-changed about my education.

Luckily, (Anshe Chesed) Fairmount Temple had a parent/ child Hebrew class that my older daughter and I took together. It was a much more nurturing and fun experience, and my chanting is now top notch (not really, but it’s a lot better). I think if I’d had a similar experience as a kid, I would’ve felt more con dent leading up to the big day. I’m so glad my kids had it better.

DJ or live band?

We had a DJ and it was a blast. Since it was an actual dance club, the music was piped in. All very professional.

What were you wearing, and do you still stand by that choice?

I know what I wore to the service (on a di erent day than the party) mainly because a few photos exist. I wore a white eyelet summer dress with a poofy matching jacket. I remember liking the dress and disliking the jacket. But I stand by the entire out t. It could have been much, much worse.

Do you still have anything saved from that day—out t, invitation, photos, favors?

Just the jewelry and a few blurry photos that my dad took after the service. But I treasure them all.

What advice would you give a 13-year-old today on that big day?

I would assure her not to worry, to enjoy the moment, and that—against all odds— someday she would conquer public speaking. I would also wish her a hearty mazel tov because she deserved it.

Making Memories: Unique Venues for Your Family’s Next Mitzvah

Noell Wolfgram Evans

For generations, bar and bat mitzvahs have marked a cherished moment of growth, tradition and community. Today, families are nding new ways to celebrate, blending the sacred milestone with creative venues that re ect both heritage and fun. Whether it’s bowling, music, golf or animal encounters, these spaces highlight how the joy of a mitzvah can be shared in fresh and memorable ways.

Stillwater Place: A Roaring Good Time

For some, Stillwater Place is one of those “I had no idea” event locations. Located on the grounds of the Cleveland Metroparks Zoo, Stillwater o ers the opportunity to give b’nai mitzvah guests an experience unlike any other in the city. It is a full-service event space with a large patio and what Sam Cario, Cleveland Metroparks director of events and experiences, described as “picturesque backgrounds for any event.”

“One of the unique di erentiators of Stillwater is the ability to include zoo attractions into your event,” Cario says. That could include rides on the nearby Circle of Wildlife Carousel or up-close animal encounters.

Stillwater also o ers traditional party amenities. According to Cario, it “comfortably seats up to 230 people at tables with a dance oor, or you could have more than 400 for a standing-room reception.”

“We have an exclusive caterer on site,” Cario says. “They o er upscale menu options and are very well connected with the kosher catering community.”

Another major perk, he says, is that “every event has an exclusive built-in event planner to help the host maneuver through all of those little inevitable speed bumps.”

“Our experienced event team will work closely with the event host to ensure that we can make the day go o perfectly,” Cario says. “We walk into every event knowing that it is unique, and our goal is to make each event a lasting memory.”

Stillwater is booking into 2026 and 2027. If you’re considering the space, Cario suggests a site visit. “We strongly encourage a site visit so we can paint a picture of what the event looks like,” he says. “After all, Stillwater isn’t a venue, it’s an experience.”

At Stillwater Place, located at the Cleveland Metroparks Zoo, you can

Spins Bowl: Get the Party Rolling

“I always hear from people who say they didn’t initially think of bowling for their party but they were glad they came,” says Ashley Yanoscik, assistant general manager and event coordinator for Spins Bowl Independence.

Spins o ers 47,000 square feet of fun, and b’nai mitzvah family hosts can use as much of it as they need.

A party at Spins is about more than gutters and strikes. The center sees itself as “the perfect family-friendly environment,” Yanoscik says.

It has 36 lanes for bowling, plus laser tag and a fully stocked arcade. Parents can mix and match those in a variety of package options. “If you want specialized entertainment like a band or roving magician, we’ll help incorporate that into your day,” Yanoscik says. “My goal is to make your time with us as enjoyable as it can be.”

Spins also has several party rooms and a banquet room that seats just under 100. Families can also rent the entire facility for maximum privacy and access to all entertainment options.

“As for meals, a lot of people don’t know that we do our own catering,” Yanoscik tells Bar•Bat Mitzvah. “We can bring in kosher meals as needed.”

Although open dates are available, Yanoscik recommends calling early to reserve the space and secure a date.

Five Iron Golf: It’s Not a Competition (But It Sort of Is)

What do you do when your celebrant loves sports but can’t decide which one to play at the party? How about all of them — under one roof.

Five Iron Golf in Shaker Heights is more than its name implies. Dany Boockvar, president of Five Iron Golf, describes it as “combining technology and practicality in an accessible way to present world-class entertainment.”

While there are several Five Iron locations, Shaker Heights o ers its own unique elements. In addition to state-of-theart golf simulators, it o ers duckpin bowling and, by summer 2026, indoor and outdoor miniature golf.

The simulators allow players to experience more than 300 golf courses or enjoy multisport games including soccer, dodgeball, baseball, football and hockey. They also serve another purpose, Boockvar tells Bar•Bat Mitzvah: “The simulator is an epic place to play the montage.”

The space can be adjusted for parties of varying sizes. “If you have 50 or 100 people, we can cordon o an area. For a larger party,

Above: A party at Five Iron Golf o ers golf simulators, duckpin bowling, and—coming summer 2026—indoor and outdoor miniature golf.

Below: At House of Blues Cleveland, history, art, food, and music all come together under one roof.

you can rent the entire space, which holds about 250 people,” Boockvar says.

Food and drink are also a highlight of the venue. “We have an excellent catering team with dedicated menus for events,” Boockvar says. “We’re happy to collaborate as needed, including working with kosher caterers.”

“It’s not just about golf here — it’s the courses, the competition, the full experience,” Boockvar says. A recent b’nai mitzvah celebration had a “Sweets on the Course” theme with cotton candy at every simulator bay and custom golf ball favors. “There was lots of sugar and smiles,” he says.

House of Blues Cleveland: Get the Party Rockin’

“Eclectic, colorful and full of energy” is how Cindi Bessette, director of sales at the House of Blues Cleveland, describes the style of the downtown Cleveland concert hall. Bessette says the venue is “one of the few spaces in the city where history, art, food and music all come together under one roof.”

The open spaces allow for party personalization. “One of our favorites was when we transformed the Music Hall into a ski chalet for a bar mitzvah — complete with Belgian wa es, hot cocoa, faux camp res and even an authentic ski lift for photos,” Bessette says.

The Music Hall is one of the most popular spaces, with multilevel areas that let kids and adults enjoy themselves separately but still stay connected.

Food and drinks are another highlight of the downtown Cleveland event space. “Our culinary team builds custom menus to fit each event — from kid-friendly favorites to elegant plated dinners,” Bessette says. “Guests can also work with our mixologists to create signature cocktails.”

Entertainment is, naturally, at the core. “Whether you want to bring in your own DJ or band, or tap into our connections with local talent and national acts, we’ll help you nd the right t,” Bessette says.

ETHAN GRUHIN

Bar mitzvah: May 17, 2025

Synagogue: Congregation Mishkan Or Celebration: Cleveland Marriott East

O ciant: Rabbi Joshua Caruso Age: 12

Hometown: Solon

What was the best part of the day?

Ethan: The best part of the service was reading from the Torah, especially because I had prepared for months with my grandfather and felt so con dent in that moment. At the party, the most exciting part was walking into “EthanCon” and seeing the whole vision come to life. The pinball machines, caricature artist, digital displays, and merch station were exactly how I imagined. I’ll never forget being lifted up in the chair during the hora, picking ra e tickets, and giving away posters of my favorite characters. Altogether, it felt like the perfect celebration of everything I love.

Sydney Gruhin,, mother: The best part of the day was watching Ethan truly take the lead in the service. He read the Torah and haftorah and led the service with such con dence and spoke so genuinely from his heart during his speech; it was a proud and moving moment for us as parents. Later that evening, it was pure joy to see him embrace the celebration, sharing his love of comics with friends and family, and fully enjoying being the center of attention. Seeing his smile, his dancing, and his excitement throughout the night is something we will always treasure.

What advice do you have for other young adults preparing for their b’nai mitzvahs?

Ethan: My advice is to really take your time, listen to your tutors, and practice as much as you can. The more con dent you feel leading up to the service, the bigger di erence it will make. Don’t forget to practice reading the English parts, especially your speech, even more than the Hebrew, because that can actually be the trickiest part. When it comes to your service project, choose something that is personal and meaningful to you. I decided to clean out and collect new books for the Camp Wise Library because both reading and Camp Wise are really important to me, and that made the project feel extra special.

DRESSING THE PART: BAR AND BAT MITZVAH

STYLE TIPS FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY

Amy Richards

Planning a bar or bat mitzvah takes time, energy and care — from helping your child prepare for the ceremony to organizing the celebration. When the big day arrives, everyone in the family wants to feel con dent in what they’re wearing. Style experts from Knuth’s in Pepper Pike, Style Vault CLE in Woodmere and Ticknors in Beachwood share their best advice for looking sharp while honoring tradition.

CLASSIC AND PHOTO-FRIENDLY

Jake Moss, sales associate at Ticknors in Beachwood, recommends keeping it timeless.

“Neutral and classic colors are always a safe choice because they look great in photos and never feel out of place,” Moss says. For parents, he suggests clean, tailored pieces that look polished without trying too hard. For siblings, staying in the same color family but mixing shades and styles creates cohesion. One thing to avoid? “Really bright or neon shades that can be distracting,” he says.

TRENDING LOOKS

Statement accents Courtney Koken, social media, marketing and events coordinator at Knuth’s, highlights bold touches: Western suede, leather, studs and rhinestones. For men, she likes blazers over slim trousers; for girls, rich jewel tones and textured fabrics. Moms can opt for sophisticated jumpsuits, dresses or layered looks that coordinate with their children.

Elegant enough for the service, stylish enough for you. Stay unique, polished, and respectful - all in one look. Photo courtesy of Knuth’s.

Heritage meets modern

Amy Goldberg of Style Vault CLE points to nostalgic prints such as jacquard and tartan, along with fall staples like velvet, lace, faux fur and suede accessories. Footwear gets an update with kitten heels and loafers in fresh colors, shiny nishes and chunkier soles.

Some of fall’s biggest comebacks? Brooches and capes. For moms, Goldberg recommends modest dresses with modern details or chic separates, such as silk blouses with wide-leg trousers.

Sharp tailoring

Moss notes that double-breasted suits are trending: “They give a sharp, elevated feel without being over the top.” Accessories like a watch or pocket square can elevate the look.

For moms, he recommends midi- or tea-length dresses in jewel tones or owy fabrics. Dads can modernize with slimmer cuts or suits with texture. For boys, muted tones and the “old money” look — tailored suits in navy, gray or earthy shades — are especially popular.

BALANCING TRADITION AND PERSONAL STYLE

Each stylist emphasized blending respect for tradition with individual air.

Koken: “You don’t need to sacri ce style for tradition. The key is balance — being respectful while building personal style with details and accessories.”

Goldberg: “Religious expectations need to be respected, but let your kids show their own style with fabric and silhouettes. Kids want to feel like themselves on the bimah — just a more celebrated version.” She suggests formal shoes for photos, then sneakers for dancing.

Moss: “Tradition comes rst, but there’s always room to show personality,” he said, recommending bow ties, pocket squares or a splash of color.

WHEN TO START PLANNING

All three experts agree: start early. Give yourself one to three months before the big day to plan out ts, coordinate accessories and schedule tailoring. Early preparation means less last-minute stress — and more time to enjoy the celebration.

What’s In and Out for Bar/Bat Mitzvahs in 2025

Jane Matousek

As planning begins for the coming-of-age bash; trends, traditions and personal air are all key aspects of celebrating a b’nai mitzvah. Je Kutz, partner and vice president of social sales for Rock The House Entertainment Group in Bedford Heights, and event specialist Amy Bilsky at Party 411 in Cleveland provide an inside look into the trendiest emerging components of the special day, and note which traditions you should leave behind.

TRADITIONS

Traditional Candle Lighting Ceremony: Out (but maybe making a comeback)

The long, formal candle lighting has lost steam, with families swapping it out for quicker moments. Some hand out glow lights for guests to switch on together, others are planting trees in Israel in place of candles. Still, Bilsky says if the ceremony is shortened and saved for later in the night, it could shine again.

Montage Videos: In

Guests love a look back at the guest of honor’s life, and parents love showing it o . Montage videos remain popular, whether played all at once near the end of dinner or on a loop throughout the night.

“Short and sweet is the key and during a time when everyone is already seated,” Bilsky says.

Games like Coke & Pepsi: In

Classic games continue to be a hit. Coke and Pepsi, extreme musical chairs, Who Knows Best, and hula hoop contests keep energy high. Kutz calls these games party motivators and say they’re a great way

to get kids entertained.

“While the adults are enjoying drinks and cocktails or appetizers and talking in a pre-function space, allowing the kids to become comfortable with their surroundings, seeing their friends, but also, interacting with our sta allows us or almost guarantees a successful and packed dance oor later on in the evening,” Kutz says.

DJs: In, Bands: Out

Both experts agree that DJs are the entertainment of choice. DJs can play any song, set the tone for the evening, and keep the party owing — something Bilsky says requires experience.

“I think the key to entertainment is to nd someone who is well versed in running bar and bat mitzvahs,” she says. With guests of all ages and varying energy levels, “They are di erent than weddings or other events and experience matters.”

Magicians, Dancers, Novelty Acts: In

Interactive performers add a memorable touch. At Rock The House, for example, emcees double as dancers, keeping kids engaged, energized, and well-behaved.

“Having roaming entertainers during cocktail hour or during dinner is always a fan favorite,” Kutz says.

FOOD AND DRINK

Interactive Food Stations (make-yourown donuts, candy bars, boba stations): In

Activities like make-your-own donuts or candy bars are a great option for guests who may not feel like dancing is their specialty, or for guests who need a break from the dance oor.

“They are so much fun, and everyone loves these stations,” Bilsky says. “I’ve seen interactive bars for adults and kids, candy stations, boba stations, cupcake decorating, ice cream sundae bars, popcorn bu ets and more. The sky is the limit.”

Mocktail Bars for Kids: Out

Nothing will knock the Shirley Temple from its long-renowned number one spot for the children’s drink of choice, so mocktail bars might not be worth the time or money.

PARTY FAVORS

Customized Sweatshirts/Merchandise: In

Personalized sweatshirts and merch are now the most popular favors. Families can carry the colors and designs throughout the event, tying the theme together.

“Almost all of my bar and bat mitzvah kids want them for their favor,” Bilsky says. “Pricing varies based on how much art you have and how many colors for designs, so there are ways to keep the cost down with these popular favors.”

Socks: Out

The old standby of giving socks so girls could ditch uncomfortable heels has faded. Sneakers are now the standard footwear.

“We haven’t seen socks for the girls as often, because heels aren’t a thing – Air Force Ones are,” Kutz says.

“Kudos to whatever teens realized you can wear a dress and sneakers!” Bilsky says.

OVERALL VIBE

Big Blowout or Intimate Gathering: You Decide

Whether large or small, formal or casual, the most important element is celebrating in a way that feels right for the family.

“It has nothing to do with trends,” Kutz says. “It has everything to do with the family – their style. You can have a successful bar or bat mitzvah at a bowling alley, at your local synagogue, at a country club or a hotel ballroom.”

“If you want an intimate gathering at your home, then that’s wonderful,” Bilsky says. “Alternatively, if you want a blowout with hundreds of people, that is great too. Just decide what is best for you and your child and enjoy.”

For more information on Rock The House Entertainment Group, visit rthgroup.com.

For more information on Party411, visit party411events.com.

SPOTLIGHT

RALEIGH LEPENE

Bat Mitzvah: May 24, 2025

Synagogue: Park Synagogue

Celebration Venue: Beechmont Country Club

O ciant: Rabbi Joshua Sko

Age: 13

Hometown: Pepper Pike

School: Brady Middle School

What was the best part of the day?

Raleigh: The best part of my Bat Mitzvah was standing on the Bema and leading the service in front of all my friends and family. After working so hard for over a year on something that was really challenging, it felt incredibly rewarding—I have never felt so proud of myself and so loved. I also absolutely loved my party; it was so much fun and so special. But what made the day even more amazing was celebrating with my sleepaway camp friends who came from all over the country, and then having a special sleepover with them after the party.

Courtney Lepene, mother: In addition to watching our daughter shine during her service, we loved dancing the night away at her party. It was amazing to see both kids and adults on the dance oor having a blast together. We had so much fun with her “Raleighwood” theme—it t her perfectly since she loves performing and being on stage. One of our favorite parts was creating the entrance video with Steve Hacker (Steven Hacker Films). It was creative, funny, and really set the tone for the night. We included our whole family and grandparents, and it’s something we watch often and will cherish forever. What advice do you have for other young adults preparing for their b’nai mitzvahs?

Raleigh: When the studying and preparation feels overwhelming, don’t give up—all the time and e ort is worth it. During my service, I realized that everyone was there to cheer me on, not to judge me. And most importantly, you only become a Bat Mitzvah once, so embrace the experience and enjoy every single moment.

Building a Better World, One Mitzvah Project at a Time

Ed Carroll

There’s a lot to do as a child prepares for a bar or bat mitzvah — from learning the ritual itself to nalizing details of the party that follows. One important element, however, sometimes gets overlooked: the mitzvah project.

While it may not get as much attention as the celebration, the project is deeply rooted in Jewish tradition. Both Aviva Roland, managing director of the Jewish Federation of Cleveland’s Jewish Volunteer Network, and Gadi Galili, ritual director at Park Synagogue in Pepper Pike, emphasize that performing mitzvot stems directly from the Torah.

In the United States, “mitzvah” is often translated loosely as “good deeds,” Galili explains, but that’s not quite accurate. In Hebrew, the word is closer to “an obligation.”

Roland notes that she doesn’t know exactly when today’s concept of a mitzvah project began, but the practice is a natural extension of Jewish teachings.

“It makes sense that as a young person is starting their adult Jewish journey, that the bar mitzvah is not the culmination of something, it’s the start of Jewish adulthood,” she says. “That they have to struggle with and make

For his mitzvah project, Ethan Gruhin helped rebuild the Camp Wise library, collecting and organizing more than 1,300 books

their own relationship with these mitzvahs and this concept makes sense to me.”

The word bar means “son of,” and mitzvah means “commandment,” she notes, so part of that coming-of-age process is learning to build one’s own relationship with those commandments and with the responsibilities of Jewish life.

Compared with previous generations, today’s mitzvah projects tend to be more focused and personalized. Galili points out that in the past, families might have simply donated to a cause like the Jewish National Fund. Now, children often decide exactly where their contributions should go.

“Today, it’s not just to plant trees in Israel, it’s where to plant the tree, and sometimes for who,” he says. “‘It should be for a park, a park that kids or disabled kids can play there, or wounded soldiers can rest there.’ More things that are more individual, with more awareness.”

Roland agrees, adding that what makes a mitzvah project meaningful is the child’s personal connection to it, regardless of whether the project involves time, money or e ort.

“One thing that can make a mitzvah project meaningful is if the bar mitzvah student, the child, has actually chosen it themselves and been a part of the process of designing the project, as opposed to something just being handed to them and told to do it,” she says. “And I think that’s true for adults, also. You’re much more invested in something when you’ve had a hand in designing it and choosing it.”

Mitzvah Projects in Action

Raleigh Lepene

For her mitzvah project, Raleigh Lepene of Pepper Pike, left, volunteered with Broadway Buddies, a Stagecrafters musical theater program that pairs volunteers with teens and young adults with special needs to help them shine on stage. Drawn by her love of theater and her desire to support others, she worked closely with her partner, April, right, assisting with staging, choreography and rehearsal sessions.

“I just wanted, to be there for her and make sure she knew that I had her back,” Raleigh says.

Photo courtesy of the Lepene family.

To read more about Raleigh’s Bat Mitzvah turn to Page 24

For her mitzvah project, Mia Levy of Shaker Heights volunteered with Food Strong, a Cleveland nonpro t that uses fresh food to empower, educate and promote health across Northeast Ohio. Once a month, she helps weed and tend the group’s urban garden.

“I wanted to support an organization that isn’t as wellknown yet,” Mia says, adding, “I think everyone should have [access to] nutritious and healthy food.”

Photo courtesy of the Levy family

Ethan Gruhin

For his mitzvah project, Ethan Gruhin of Solon helped rebuild the library at Camp Wise. After noticing the camp’s collection was worn and outdated, he reorganized the space and collected more than 1,300 new and gently used books—from fantasy to ction to comics—through donations from family, friends, and the Cleveland Kids’ Book Bank. “Both reading and Camp Wise are really important to me, and that made the project feel extra special,” he says.

Photo courtesy of the Gruhin family

To read more about Ethan’s Bar Mitzvah turn to Page 16

SHAI YOUNG

For his bar mitzvah project, Shai Young of Solon honored the memory of his close friend Cole Zelwin, who passed away from leukemia two and a half years ago. Shai collected games for kids with cancer at Rainbow Babies and Children’s Hospital, so they would have something to do while staying at the hospital.

“I wanted to dedicate my project to Cole and make it about him,” Shai says. “His passing shocked my life, but thanks to my mom, dad, and sister, I’ve learned to live while honoring and remembering him every day. I’m very lucky to have had Cole in my life.”

Photo courtesy of the Young family

Spotlight Turning Passion Into Purpose: Lila Rubinstein’s Mitzvah Project

When it comes to mitzvah projects, one of the toughest steps often comes at the very beginning: deciding what to do.

It’s an important decision, but not an impossible one. Both Gadi Galili, ritual director at Park Synagogue in Pepper Pike, and Aviva Roland, managing director at the Jewish Federation of Cleveland’s Jewish Volunteer Network, note that the best projects are those that connect a child to the community in some way. And in Northeast Ohio, there is no shortage of places where students can make an impact.

Twelve-year-old Lila Rubinstein is a prime example.

At Congregation Mishkon Or in Beachwood, every bar or bat mitzvah student is expected to perform a mitzvah project. At rst, Rubinstein thought about supporting cancer patients.

“We’ve had a lot of cases of cancer in my family and deaths from it in the past couple of years,” she says. “So I was going to do something with that, but then I found out about Share What You Wear” — a project by the National Council of Jewish Women/Cleveland (NCJW/CLE) that curates bags of clothes for children and families in need through partnerships with schools and social service agencies.

The idea that kids her own age were embarrassed to go to school because they didn’t have tting, clean or fashionable clothing resonated with her.

“Clothing is de nitely a big part of my life right now,” Lila says. “It makes you t in or stand out if you want to. With clothing, you need to be able to feel like yourself, and I want other people to have that same experience that I do with clothing, like I am me, I am my best self right now, and I can work on like my school work now, and not feel selfconscious.”

Still, she wanted to infuse the project with another passion: musical theater. Combining the two, she launched a fundraiser built around performance.

Lila held a garage sale, raising about $200 to cover expenses. With the funds, she acquired costumes, rented a performance space, hired an accompanist and promoted her show, “Royal Tea,” with yers she handed out at events and playgrounds.

She then recruited her friends from musical theater to perform Disney princess numbers. Dozens of little girls in princess dresses lled the audience, watching in awe as their heroes came to life on stage. At the end of the performance, Lila explained Share What You Wear’s mission and encouraged donations of clothing and money. Afterward, the performers held a meet-and-greet and posed for photos.

“I was de nitely blown away by how many generous donations came in and how many people care about helping others who are having a harder time,” Lila says. “I think everyone there learned something too [about clothing needs].”

For Lila, the experience brought her closer to Share What You Wear.

“I thought it was an amazing organization, and I’m so happy I could contribute. Once I’m older, or maybe even during summer, I de nitely want to volunteer there.”

Her commitment extended beyond the show. When she delivered the donations – 11 bags of clothing and $650 — she toured Share What You Wear’s facility and peppered sta with thoughtful questions.

“She wanted to see everything and spent 45 minutes asking really good questions,” says Heather Schlang, co-chair of NCJW/CLE’s Share

To kick o her mitzvah project, Lila Rubinstein organized a garage sale at her house, raising money to bene t NCJW/CLE’s Share What You Wear.

What You Wear. “For example, when I said we provide all new socks and underwear, she asked, ‘What about new bras?’ She even noticed on an order sheet that one boy wasn’t receiving shoes he needed. That led to a whole discussion.”

Schlang says Lila’s project was exactly what makes mitzvah work meaningful – and why, especially for NCJW/CLE, this is a perfect partnership.

“It’s perfect because it engages kids in her own age range,” she says. “A lot of our requests come from that age group, so it’s really helpful when projects connect with them. This is the best – when you connect something you love and make a di erence.”

For families served by Share What You Wear, the donations are about more than just lling a need.

“We operate on what I call a Walmart budget,” Schlang says. “But when we’re able to send out something like a brand-new North Face jacket, it’s not the same as a generic one. Name brands make kids feel good. When students like Lila help us source those items, it makes a real di erence.”

Lila’s mitzvah project may have started as a question of what to do, but it became much more: a chance to combine her passion with purpose and to make her community stronger in the process. She thinks every teenager should take this kind of project on.

“Even if it’s just holding a yard sale to support your favorite puppy organization, it makes a di erence,” she says. “If every kid in the world did something like a mitzvah project – even if they’re not Jewish – it would add up to a huge impact. And the world would look a lot better than it does right now.”

Lighting the Way:

How Young People Make B’nai Mitzvahs Their Own

Jimmy Oswald

When it comes to planning a b’nai mitzvah, many families find themselves navigating a delicate balance: honoring Jewish tradition while creating a ceremony that reflects their child’s individuality, needs and passions. For some, that might mean shortening the service, changing its setting or reimagining elements of the spiritual ritual.

Rabbi Eddie Sukol of The Shul in Pepper Pike says the milestone is not about the details of the ceremony but about a spiritual transition. A child becomes a bar or bat mitzvah simply by

reaching the age of 13 — or 12 for girls in some segments of Judaism.

“What essentially happens is they become responsible for their own Jewish practice,” Sukol says. “That doesn’t mean they’re not influenced by their family and parents – of course they are. But the difference is that no longer are the parents responsible for the child’s religious observance.”

That understanding opens the door for families to shape ceremonies in ways that feel authentic. Sukol has overseen services that might be considered atypical – from a musically talented child leading prayers on an electric keyboard to a bat mitzvah held at a nature center. In each case, he says, personalization is not a break from tradition but a natural extension of it.

For Ryan Lewis, a 13-year-old with high-functioning autism and ADHD, a traditional bar mitzvah service was not the right fit. “It’s very hard for him to focus on non-preferred activities and tasks,” his mother, Jenna Lewis-Barker, says. Hebrew study was a struggle at first, but Ryan committed to tutoring twice a week for nearly a year – something his mother called “very impressive because it’s hard for him to focus on anything he’s not super interested in.”

When the big day arrived at Park Synagogue in Pepper Pike, his parents and stepparents decided a shorter, 50-minute service was the right approach. Ryan learned his haftorah portion, and instead of giving a speech, he sat down for an onstage interview with Rabbi Joshua Skoff. The rabbi asked questions like “Why does this mean something to you?” and invited family and friends to share what they loved about Ryan.

“It was just so nice to get to hear what Ryan had to say,” Jenna says. The format allowed Ryan to shine on his own terms while still embracing the essence of the tradition.

For Liam Himmel, an eighth grader from Solon, the challenge was different but the goal the same: blending Jewish ritual with personal identity. With divorced parents of different beliefs – his father an atheist and his mother, Keren Himmel, a Sephardic Jew – the family didn’t belong to a synagogue. Keren didn’t want to force Hebrew school or Torah reading, which felt “inauthentic,” she says. Instead, she turned to a former Hebrew school teacher, Edna Talmor Akrish, who offered to help.

Together, they created a ceremony that emphasized meaning over formality. Liam began with Havdalah, the ritual that marks the end of Shabbat with blessings over wine, spices and a braided candle, symbolizing the transition from sacred time to the week ahead. He then invited loved ones to join him in a candle-lighting ceremony, where each person lit a candle and shared a few words, surrounding him with warmth and blessings.

“It was absolutely beautiful,” Keren says. “And it made Liam feel like he was part of the community.”

His celebration, held at Glass Asylum 2 in Chagrin Falls, reflected his passions for rap and graffiti. Cleveland graffiti artist Dom Lanzara designed custom artwork, candles and a logo, while the decorations featured records and street art.

“When a lot of my friends walked into my mitzvah and saw the atmosphere, the records and art, they just loved it,” Liam says. “They said they had the best time.”

Both Ryan and Liam’s experiences highlight what Sukol calls the heart of a b’nai mitzvah: helping a young person step into the community in a way that reflects who they are.

“From when the service begins to when it ends,” Sukol says, “we should know more about them, what they think and feel.”

Above: At Park Synagogue, 13-year-old Ryan Lewis marked his bar mitzvah in his own way — with a shorter, heartfelt service centered on conversation, connection, and celebrating what makes him unique. Below: After nearly a year of tutoring — starting from a point where his dad said he “didn’t know a lick of Hebrew” — Ryan Lewis proudly carried the Torah at his bar mitzvah, a moment of perseverance and pride.